Sports, Losing and Divorce

As it relates to sports the feeling that hurts the most is losing. I don't cry, I don't blame, I just want to compete and give it everything I got....leave it all on the floor. Like the great Jimmy Connors once said "I hate losing more than I love winning". I'm sure he's not the only athlete to say that as I'm sure he is not the only athlete to believe that. Winning is a great feeling, like you've accomplished something. All that hard work has finally paid off but trust me when I say I'd rather lose by two points and be challenged than win by fifty and be the man. Sports is about competing and losing simply says your opponent has out worked you tonight.

Whether you lose a game, job, relationship, friend it all sucks. Why does it suck so much? Because if you're true to yourself you take "inventory" of what went wrong. Could I have worked harder? Could I have done something better? The answer is always yes when you lose...isn't it? That's why you lost right?

Recently I lost at the game of life. I got a divorce! OK so lets take the "inventory"...I lost a friend, a good one at that. I lost my son, my house, my heart, my self worth...the list goes on. I didn't actually lose my relationship with my son but when you don't see someone everyday who you planned on seeing everyday for the rest of my life...that's a lose. Like sports when you win you shrug it off, feel good and move on. When I was with my son everyday I guess I took it all for granted. Now when I'm alone writing in the middle of the night the losing part really hurts. Maybe I'm like a possessed coach going back to the drawing board, sleeping on my couch in the office and figuring out how to make it better. I twist and I turn and ask myself "what could have I done different?" Twenty more push ups, listened more, communicated better? The sad part is that I won't get a second chance. Maybe with someone else some day but never again in that situation. Dam...that's why you've got to love sports, there is always another game, another chance to redeem yourself. Maybe in my relationship I had all those chances but never realized it because there was no referee and no scoreboard.

I have no answers today so I may just be writing to get all of this off my chest. Who knows but I will tell you that's why I love sports...........you always get a second chance and you always know it.