3:30 In The Morn!

A month has passed since my last entry…what has happened in my life?

On an awesome (thank you Bret Michaels for making the word awesome awesome again) note my team the Pittsburgh Steelers pulled out an epic finish to win their sixth Super Bowl title. I only remember two of them but last weekend’s game was freaking incredible. With about 2:30 to go in the game I couldn’t help myself from day dreaming how all my “friends” were going to give me a ton of shit on how the Steelers lost to the Cardinals. I got about ten texts and three voicemails with all my “friends” claiming their allegiance to the Cardinals. It doesn’t matter that their teams had also lost to the Cardinals this year. My team was pooping themselves on national TV!!! Not good. My favorite voicemail was from my buddy Dan…. I’m free styling here but it was “that guy” tone…”Hey, what are you up to right now? I’m just hanging out watching this game between the Cardinals and the Steelers. Any way, just wanted to see what you’re up to?”

What a total dick! Seriously I was a mess at that point. Losing to the Cardinals would have ruined my month, not to mention no Sports Center for a minimum of two weeks. I can’t even watch it after one of my teams loses a regular season game let alone the Super Bowl.

I also got a couple of text from some buddies who are 49er fans. Seriously??? Didn’t you lose twice to the Cardinals this year? Not to mention your coaches thought you were on the ½ yard line but you were really on the three. Now you’re a fan of the Cardinals??? They were outwardly rooting for a divisional team. And that my friend’s is the difference between the East and West coast fans. Trust me no Giants fans roots for the Cowboys to win, EVER. No Yankee fans roots for the Red Soxs, EVER. But these freaking guys were all pulling for the Cardinals. I honestly don’t get it. Who are you? West Coast fans are way softer and generally have no idea how to be a fan.

Bottom line Big Ben pulled out his 18th fourth quarter come back to the lead the mighty Steelers to victory! PS – Thank God I didn’t bet the game…I would have lost and it would have ruined my joy for the moment.


Back to Bret Michaels….this guy is my new hero. Wow, let me back up one quick second and qualify that statement. I don’t want to be him on any level I just want a ton of hot girls competing for my dong. Those girls are a total mess but I like it and find it incredibly awesome and hot that they get wasted all day and would kill to sleep with me. I’m not saying this will get you a ticket down the isle but it will definitely get you a ticket to the love machine…Q up the music “I’m just a love machine….ha” Thank you Bret Michaels and keep on keeping on.

Other than bad reality TV and not losing my job this month everything has been the same. My son is the love of my life and he continues to grow and poop his way to three. Quick story the other night or morning…really depends how you look at it. Ok, it was 3:30am and he woke up….we had the following exchange…..

“Dada”
“Yeah buddy”
“Me sick”
“What’s the matter?”
“Me sick”
At this point he gets out of bed, walks to the foot of the bed gets down on all fours and just rips one. It wasn’t any old rip, I could tell it was a sloppy mess.
“You ok buddy?”
“Poo Poo Dada”
“Do you want me to change your diaper?”
“Yesh”
I started to change his diaper and the smell just hit me. I better get something to lie on the ground this could get messy. Actually it was so smelly I decided against a towel…didn’t want to ruin one and went for an old shirt I could just throw away.
I laid the shirt beneath him
“Ok buddy lets take off your diaper” note he was standing at the time.
I was behind him and noticed there was no poop on his butt. Not a freaking drop!! Wow, maybe it was just a bad fart? I then turned him around and he was freaking covered from his waist to his knees. I started to clean him off and realized it was so much I was only spreading it around.
“Buddy, do you want to take a bath?”
“Yesh”

So off to the bath at 3:30am…..awesome!!